Feminism and Marital Discourse

In
this day and age there is much said about women not being under the
control of a man. The argument always comes down to some male jerk doing
something he shouldn’t have done to a woman and she responds in a
militant way, much to the approval of everyone in attendance.


While
I agree, there isn’t anyone who should be under the control of another,
there are limits. When you are in a relationship, married or otherwise
it has always been my belief you should try to cooperate and act in a
manner that is beneficial to each. If your mate does something that is
unacceptable, it should be discussed and the issue resolved, if
possible. Doing something for someone doesn’t mean you are under their
control.


Being
militant and demanding your rights will only create animosity and will
do nothing to make the relationship better. Just because you do
something for the other person they like doesn’t mean you are under
their control. It isn’t demeaning to iron clothes or fix a meal.


The
situation that brought this to my attention : a lady I know  was
discussing her grandparents, and an event that occurred some time ago.
It seems the husband didn’t like the way his wife ironed his shirts, and
wrinkled one of them up and threw it down the stairs in disgust,
exclaiming he didn’t like the way she ironed his shirts.


Grannie
got the message , learned from the event and proclaimed she would never
iron another shirt, and didn’t. It was hailed as a great victory for
feminism. Boy, did she show him. But what did she show him. Let him iron
his own shirts. She’s being just as chauvinistic as he is.


Well,
if she feels that way, maybe she should go out and plow the fields and
grow her own food. She can also cut her own wood for the stove to keep
herself warm. I’m sure that over time there was plenty he did that she
didn’t approve of and I’m sure she went out of her way to voice her
opinion about it.


Without
question, grandpa acted in an unacceptable manner, however Grannie’s
response was worse. She dug her heels in and by her actions created an
unresolvable situation. I’m sure grandpa also dug his heels in and as a
result, I doubt if there ever was much harmony in that house again.


I
don’t know what else happened before this little escapade, but grannie
was granted her independence , she was now a free independent  woman,
supposedly in total control over her husband,but what price did she pay?


It’s
not about control, it’s about doing something for someone else the way
they like, and thus trying to please them. What is wrong with that?


When
you are in any relationship there has to be give and take.If you aren’t
ready to do that, if you want complete independence and be under no
one’s (control), maybe you shouldn’t be in a relationship.

I tell it like it is, if you agree, you can now follow me on kindle.

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